Question: Why is a fruitcake like history? Answer: Because they are both filled with dates! Oh, yeah, go ahead and laugh at the fruitcake, but take care, because you are having a bit of a joke at the expense of a treat that has sustained travelers and delighted children for a thousand years.

Because of the ongoing social disdain for the fruitcake, there are lots of fruitcake pretenders out there, like wimpy yellow cakes with a few candied cherries. This is not a fruitcake. Fruitcakes are at the decadent end of the cake family, and they are easy to recognize. First, they are soaked with an alcohol such as rum, whiskey, bourbon, or a flavored liqueur. Second, fruitcakes are dense, moist, heavy concoctions filled with (surprise) fruit and nuts. This is not diet food. One puny ounce usually has about 100 calories. Third, a fruitcake must be aged for at least four weeks in an airtight container while the cake soaks up its liquor. A fruitcake that is soaked with liquor every four weeks can last for years, according to What’s Cooking America by Linda Stradley (Falcon Books).

Legend has it that Queen Victoria waited a year to eat her fruitcake because it demonstrated restraint to her subjects. At least that is what she said.

If you dare to risk a social blacklist, here is a wonderful fruitcake recipe to share for the holidays.

FRUITCAKE RECIPE... Not for the faint of Heart

In a plastic container or zip-lock bag, soak the dried fruit in ¼ cup of the rum for at least a day, covered tightly and at room temperature. Use the liquid in your cake.

Preheat the oven to 325 degrees F. Butter and line a 6-inch round pan or 4 x 8½ inch loaf pan with parchment paper.

Whisk together the flour, baking powder, salt, nutmeg and cinnamon. Cream the butter and sugar until fluffy and add the eggs, one at a time. Add the flour in three batches, alternating with the milk and molasses. Stir in the fruit/rum mixture and chocolate and/or nuts making sure the fruits and nuts are evenly distributed.

Pour into prepared pan smooth the top and sprinkle it evenly with the 3 tablespoons of sugar. Bake for 55 minutes to 1 hour. Let cake cool in the pan for 10 minutes, then sprinkle with 2 tablespoons of rum.

Place a piece of parchment paper, large enough to wrap entire cake, on a flat surface. Moisten a piece of cheesecloth, large enough to wrap the cake, with 1-tablespoon rum. Place the cheesecloth on top of the parchment paper, and unmold the cake on top of it. Sprinkle the top and sides of the cake with the remaining rum. Wrap the cake, pressing the cheesecloth closely to the surface of the cake. Place the cake in an airtight tin (or plastic container, and let age for at least 4 weeks. If storing longer, douse with additional rum for every 4 weeks of storage).

Variations:
Tropical Fruitcake: Substitute the following fruit; 2/3 cup dried pineapple cut into small chunks, 2/3 cup diced mango, 1/3 cup diced papaya, 1/3 cup coconut, 2/3 chopped macadamia nuts and use Malibu rum instead of regular rum.
Berry Berry Fruitcake: 2/3 cup dried strawberries. 2/3 cup dried raspberries. 1/3 cup dried blueberries. 1/3 cup currants, 1/3 cup dried cranberries and use Kirsch (cherry flavored liqueur) instead of rum.
Southern Delight Fruitcake: 2/3 cup dried diced peaches, 2/3 cup dried blueberries, 2/3 cup chopped pecans and use a good Whiskey or Bourbon.